WICKED STEP MOTHER

Who the blue blazes does she think she is? That's my father we're talking about. My son, you know, the one I don't talk to or about, called a couple of hors ago and told me that The Philmore is in hospital (Trauma ICU) on account of bleeding in his brain after fainting. My guess is that the bleeding came first and the fainting followed. I immediately started making arrangements to go over, but cancelled them after talking to the Wicked Stepmother. Turns out this happened on Sunday and just now they are getting around to telling me. He had surgery, and is now in an induced coma, so is no condition to talk to me or anyone. He's only 83, and has a living will, so if things go downhill, they'll just unplug him. I have no argument with that, but I'd like to see him and *she* says she isn't in any shape to take of me, like I'm some kind of crip what needs care. Hah! She says her kids are helping her and I'd just be a burden. If I had the $s I'd go and get a hotel room and rent a car, but I don't. So I'll just sit here and wait. If she thinks I'm going to be nice to her after he's gone, she'd better think again. This is going to cost her. It sucks to miss his funeral, but I can sit Shiva here just as easily as there, more comfortably too. Let *her* explain why I'm not there. Stupid woman should have known that my first reaction would have been to hop a plane, but she said "No" so, I won't, for the simple reason that I can't do it anyway because I'd have no place to stay. Don't know anyone in that area. So, I'll just hang around here and fume and rant and rave.

ONE GIMP TAG

Thank G-d for Saturdays. It's the one day of the week when I can play *catch-up* with myself. I've been a bit busy this past week. My toes are coming along nicely, and I have been reveling in lurching around Gimp House barefoot! Ah, the joy. One of the 4 toes wasn't a complete success, and Dr.Sawbones wanted to check it out when I went to see him on Thursday about something else entirely. I told him that it can wait until I get back from Holland.
Last week The Council decided to have a surprise party for Orna (birthday) and Danny (wedding anniversary) and it was decided that I would take of the BBQ meat and Orly would do the salads and other stuff as I can't be in the kitchen long enough to do anything edible. Orly and Haim appeared at my door on Tuesday (after I bought the meat) and announced that they had the list for me. The look on their faces was priceless when I reeled off what I'd bought earlier! Haim just crumpled the list and tossed it over his shoulder!
I spent Tuesday looking up stuff on the great WWW for Bat Chen and figuring out to tweak my finances to allow me to go to Holland with a reasonable amount of cash. After hours of figuring, I came up with "Plan Combina" which includes putting a stop on the 500 shekel deposit to my savings account for 3 months, canceling that autopayment of the dreaded electrickery bill, and a few other tweaks here and there. It's doable and with any luck at all, at least one of the jerks who still owes me money will pay up. The courts will be back at work in a few days and all my shyster has to do is put a *clamp* on Albilia's daughter's bank account, and he'll pay up PDQ. So there's some hope there. There's also 800 worth of unused stuff for the second hand guy, who has promised to but it before the trip. With that 800 and the 600 I've tweaked from my account, I can swing about 250 Euros or so. That just leaves me working on how to sort that 800 shekel check that will bounce if I don't work something out. That bit of headache came about because Orna's cupboard was bare and I took her shopping. Her part of that bill was just over 500 and my part was just under 300 or so, and there's no way she'll be able to give me her part by that date on the check. I don't know how, but one way or another I'll figure it out.
Child Genius has donated web space for Ygal, the non profit help the crips Amutah (not sure of what is in English so will use Amutah) that we started in 99, then let ride. She's been working hard on the site and it will go up today along with a message board we intend to use to answer questions and give advice on how to deal with the insanity of dealing with the practical stuff here. She calls me every few hours to run things by me, and I've had the joy of reminding her of the obvious. We needed two more members and I threw two names at her, both of whom she talks to almost daily, and thus, solved that issue. We also have a march on Jerusalem in the works, but not until after Holland!
On Thursday I went to the clinic to ask Dr. Sawbones a question about one of Ygal's cases and to ask if he would sign on as our Ortho consultant for stuff like that. He agreed, so that's sorted. When I got home from my quick jaunt into town, I took the BBQ stuff to Orly and kept her company while she made the salads, the came home to rest up for the evening. Danny was told to take Orna out until 1900. He was only told about the birthday part, not the anniversary, and Orna and Danny were surprised to arrive and find all of us in their balloon decorated yard with everything ready, including the grill. The surprise was a success. The little kids started to get on my nerves, so I left before the cake, rather than risk another outburst.
On Friday I went out early for the papers and got them read before Bat Chen started calling. Child Genius wasn't working fast enough for her,(very few people do) and I had to call him a few times, and send a bunch of e mails. I haven't heard from either of them since 2300, so, with any luck, he sent her the info. At worst, he'll be over here later and we'll do it then. I *did* get a confirmation e mail from him about the tickets for the con in Holland. So that's ok.
Today I'm just catching up with myself, reading Old Home town Newspapers and the like, until CG gets here later. Alice and Missy (from the VA A Team list got together yesterday and I'm waiting for a report from at least one of them. If nothing lands in my in box, I'll just call Alice. For now, it's over to the Times Record if the site is working today. It's been down over the last few weekends.

ODDITIES

Strange things just keep happening to/around me. Last week I was just lying in bed and thinking of nothing at all. Suddenly I "saw" a light bulb burn out. A few minutes after that I got up to go to the loo and checked that both lights that I always leave on were still on. They were. About an hour after that I came over to the computer, when, after 10 or so minutes, the light bulb here burnt out, just as I had "seen" previously.
Leia and I have mailing back and forth planning our Utrecht jaunt. I reserved my flights without any knowledge of her flight times. For some strange reason I wasn't too surprised to learn that we couldn't have done better if we had tried. I arrive at Schipol at 0850, she arrives at 1305. That leaves me waiting for her, which is just fine as getting from the plane, through to the exit takes some time. Ok, so it takes her the same amount of time, but as I have no problem waiting (as long as I have a book to read) it's just fine. The amazing thing is that our flights home leave within 45 minutes of each other. I'm sure that if we had tried to coordinate, we couldn't have done any better!
The Council is busy planning a birthday/anniversary party for Orna and Danny. The BBQ is sorted and I'm sure Orly has taken care of her end. The bash is planned for tomorrow as they have other plans for the big day itself.
Advice: Do not watch The Patriot with Stephen Segal while reading King's Dreamcatcher. It's too confusing for words.
I am now officially addicted to Sorbo's Hercules series. It is actually a very sophisticated show with endless humor that probably goes right over must of it's apparent target viewers heads. Yesterday we were treated to an episode with a character who was a writer named Parenthesis. Cracked me up, it did. I tend to pay pretty close attention so as not to miss those things. There's also a recurring character named Felafel who invents all kinds of fast foods that inevitably cause much havoc. Salmonius, another regular gets his name scrambled to things like Salmonella among others. Oh, yes, I do like Hercules. Funny stuff, and brilliantly done. I recommend the episode when he invents the Oplympic Games.
I've noticed that Sorbo tends towards very short sidekicks, like the guy who plays Eolus and Harper from Andromeda. They both are excellent straight men for him. Oh, yes, I do like The Sorbo guy.
Zena which is from the same production crew for the most part is good as well, for the same reasons. They also use some of the same characters from Hercules, including a few episodes with Sorbo, and Lawless shows up in Hercules as well. Much fun and many hours of sheer enjoyment.

THE LUCK OF THE LAME AND HALT

With my bank account yet again approaching disaster, I've been trying to figure out how in the world I'm going to pay for my trip to Holland next month. Every time I go into my travel agent it seems the price has gone up. Today was the big day. The flight had to be paid before fares went up again. While still in the small talk part of things, I asked Jenny if maybe there wasn't a cheaper fare? She checked and lo and behold, there was one seat for $ 150 less. We grabbed it, and after many complicated mathematical calculations I wrote three checks for the whole thing, flights and hotel, for a lot less than I thought. My cheek muscles ache from smiling. The whole amount is well within my limited ability to pay even if none of the jerks who owe me money cough up anything by then! The Gimp Of Purple Traveling Road Show is ready for take off. I've even got the cash part sorted, not to mention the gifts from the Holy Land for Dwight and Dirk. Nope, I'm not telling, but I am confident that they will really like them.
I am so thankful that the cost worked out. I've been sending up little prayers of thanks since I left the travel agent.
We are now at my favorite part of the whole travel thing, the tickets and hotel are sorted, so the trip is a go, and that delicious period of anticipation starts. I just love this run up to the trip itself. It's almost more enjoyable than the actual trip, operative word there being ALMOST. I just love it!!!

BAREFOOT IN THE PARK and FRIED KETTLE

After almost 7 years of misery during which I couldn't walk without terrible pain in my left foot, I can now lurch around Gimp House barefoot! The post operative pain was nothing compared with the pain of the last 7 years. Ok, so I still can't walk all that well and spend a fair amount time in the wheelchair, but *that* pain is gone. I'll get rid of them (the pains) one by one.
Now that Bat Chen and I are bringing Igal back to life we are going to add 'medical disclosure' as one of our goals. There were so many things I had to find out on my own after the stroke that should have been told me long before I stumbled on them. The anti pee pills are at the top of the list. I should have been informed that they exist while in rehab at the latest. Instead I had to have a brainstorm after wetting the bed for the 100th time and call a friend who is a Urologist and ask him if there's anything. Since that day, I've been able to go for well over an hour between loo runs, and sleep without waking up soaked. Second on the list is the operation for hammer toes. The rehab folk solved that with a plastic thing that was also supposed to fix the drop foot. Go wear one of those plastic things in the summer. I solved that by going to the pool every day and walking back and forth across the pool for an hour to strengthen the ankle. It didn't help the toes at all in spite of that fact that I did stretching exercises for them in the pool as well. Of course all that *pool walking* made my knees even worse, but it was a fair trade to get rid of the plastic. I thank G-d daily for the residual muscles from my mispent youth on ice, all the running up and down the 16 storey building across the street and thousands of sit up I did back when. Granted some of those are the very things that landed me in the wheelchair, but they also are the very things that help me every day. I still chuckle Remembering Dr.S's face when I kept popping up on the way to the O.R. He wasn't expecting that. I can still do 50 situps without blinking and do them every day. Go Gimp.
Last evening I was IMing with Jaguar and had put the kettle on for a coffee. As the oven was on at the time, I had to use the stove top one so as not to blow the fuse. The handle caught fire and was burning merrily even after I cut the gas. Oh well, I'll just have to use the microwave when the oven is in use. It's too bad as that's the kettle I got on the way to the operation, and I really liked it! Orna is going to kill me as the fire made a mess of the nice clean stove top!
Child Genius is on his way over to sort gimphouse.com and Rita's site. We will also discuss space for Igal.

GOING BALD

I am more than ready to tear my hair out by the roots. I took by poor four bolted toes to the clinic after swallowing the last pain killer, and settled into Ambush Position to wait for Dr. Sawbones. On the way into the clinic he proudly pulled a plier thing from his bag and brandishing it, asked if I'm ready. I must have been because he started pulling things out of my toes. I swear they were in there up to my knees! All I ever saw of them before was the little black stoppers on the ends of the wires to stop them from going in any more. It hurt less than taking the stitches out and then, he told be to get up and take a few steps. I WALKED BAREFOOT FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 1998!!! Of course there was a trail of blood from the holes, but who cares? The barefoot kid from Maine is back. Dr. S put a light bandage on and told me to wait outside his examining room for 10 or so minutes to be sure there's no serious bleeding. There was none, so after 10 minutes of sitting with my back to the waiting room TV (news boycott, remember?) I was dismissed with orders tp return next Thursday for a look-see.
Dwight, Bless him posted to the DM list about the Gaza withdrawal and of course I jumped right in and went all history teacherish. I have no trouble talking about it, I simply refuse to watch it.
Bat Chen called and announced that she's supposed to be on the radio this afternoon. We went over the points she has to make, then, I went to set up the VCR as the TV card is still down. She didn't know which station, and it hasn't come on either TV yet, both are on different radio stations. I am blocking out the one with Gaza coverage. Sheesh, if she can't remember which station she's supposed to be on, there's not much I can do, is there?
No matter, I can go out tomorrow and TAT is up in an hour. AND I CAN WALK BAREFOOT or rather, I'll be able to as soon as the holes in my toes heal.
The title of this post refers to my anger and frustration at the nonstop coverage of the withdrawal. It's every place. It reminds me of the way our TV news people cover terror attacks. They repeat themselves for hours on end and show the same of loop of tape ad nauseum. After 10 minutes the viewer knows everything they know, so it's ok to go to another channel. No, this is worse. they are parading the pain of those brave patriots in the worst way possible. I WILL NOT WATCH IT. I know how they feel and will not contribute to the ratings of the stations that are doing this to them.

BAH HUMBUG SUMMER

99 degrees is really too hot for me to go out in. I might change my mind tomorrow, as staying in because of something like that just isn't me. I must try to get through this without the a/c. It's too expensive to run these days. Electrickery rates have almost doubled since I had the a/c installed, but my income hasn't. I have to go out on Thursday anyway to get my bolts taken out, and it's time to sort the payment for Holland. I'm not sure how that will work out yet, as the Albilia thing is dragging on endlessly. One thing I do know, is that it will get sorted, and I will get my hands on the cash needed. I did absolutely nothing today except nap and watch TV and read a bit. At least the toes hurt less and I can quit those pain pills.
Maybe I should start harassing Striar the Liar again for the money he still owes me. Not that he'll pay it, but why should I be the only one suffering?
So far I'm doing just fine with my self imposed no news edict. I'm perfectly happy in my ignorance and feel no need to find out how the withdrawal is going. Too bad The Media wasn't banned from covering it, but, the humiliation must be public.

MUST BE GETTING BETTER

If I've been able to post twice here today, my foot must be getting better!
The Philmore aka Dad called today to see how my foot is after the op. I couldn't have been more pleased, as he's been a bit forgetful lately. Like I'm not? He asked about the weather and I took a wild guess and told him "high nineties!" That was some guess. I just checked Yahoo and it was 99 today. Doesn't get much higher than that in the nineties, does it? It's going to stay right up there for the next 10 days or so.
The fast is over and I'm enjoying my first beer since the Toe Job. Ahhhhhhhh, it is nice.
After watching the 1700 news flash I have decided not to watch any more news for the next two weeks. The lies and distortions coming from the mouths of Peres, Sharon and their lackeys are just too much to bear. The only thing of interest to me on the news is the weather, and I can get that on Yahoo.
I don't mean to sound condescending here, but, when I reread my posts and see the typos and left words, it reminds me that I once heard that goofs of that type are signs of intelligence. The mind thinks faster than the fingers type and words get left out. It happens when I write by hand as well, so I must be a little bit smart. That supposedly also explains why the goofs aren't caught in a goof reading immediately after writing it. The mind sees what is supposed to be there, even if it isn't.

SLOWLY BUT SORELY

They are taking their own sweet time to heal, my toes are. We, my toes and I, just finished 10 days of antibiotics, and I can walk (sort of) again.
Thursday was a barrel of fun. Dr. Sawbones took the stitches out and we nearly caused a riot at the clinic. The a/c there wasn't working, so he decided to do it in the nurses room. Of course there were lots of people there who needed the nurses and their room, and as all them were Israelis they wanted service *now*. One of the idiot clerks kept telling us that we could use another room, to which we replied that if *we* could use another room, so could *they*. The stitches came out one by one, and yeah, it hurt, but, it's done, and the infection seems to be gone. The bolts might come out next week. I had a fun time taking pictures of the toes, but will not post them here. Way too gross. I spent the rest of the day resting up because Bat Chen had said they might come up for the weekend on Friday. In the end they came on Thursday, which was fine, except I didn't have much to eat in the house. Zohar finally came and bought the cursed Penguin a/c and said he'll buy the other stuff next week. Bat Chen being Bat Chen, called for directions on how to get to Gimp House from the main road. I can tell anyone else to go to the round about, then, follow the signs to Yad Sarah, but not Bat Chen. she went sailing past the critical sign and I had to jump on Harley Too to find her and guide her back! It's a good thing I know every nook and cranny of this town! We got her parked, the stuff out of the van, settled Reef to sleep and went over that law we basing focusing on.
I woke up early on Friday and waited impatiently for them to surface. I had stuff to do in town, so I woke her enough to tell her I was going to town, and would be back ASAP. I dumped 500 in the bottomless pit that is my bank account, tried to find the local papers, bought 2 chickens, then came home. We had coffee, then settled in my *office* to further discuss ways and means. Bat Chen kept saying "need a lawyer", until she remembered that she can ask Aadel, who just happened to be visiting his parents at Cfar Yasif near Akko. It was decided to meet him there at 1700, so, off we went. Aadel went over the copy we found of the law that we had questions about and at some point it was decided that after we sort that issue, we will reactivate Igal-the nonprofit group we set up in 99, and start working through Igal to solve other issues that the big times gimp leaders either don't know or care about. The plan was to stop at KFC on the way home, but the van had a problem and we had to stop and figure out what to do. The problem righted itself and we continued on our way. By then, KFC was closed, so we decided to eat at home. Lucky for us that Orna and I made those fish cakes and that they are nukable. We pulled up at Gimp House to find no place to park, but Haim was outside, so we gave a yell and he moved his car and directed us close to the curb, then, helped us into the house, where we ate, then crashed to sleep. I was smart enough to keep my foot on the wheelchair pillow all the time in the van, so it didn't hurt as much as it would have otherwise.
We got up early on Saturday, took it easy getting them ready to go home as the van needs checking out. They left at 1030 or so. They got home 3 phone calls for directions and 4 hours later.
I spent the day resting up, and am now trying to catch up here, with the foot on a pillow which helps a bit.
I'm quite pleased that we are reactivating Igal. There's a lot that needs doing, and we are good at it! Best of all is that it will be October before we get it up and moving. That gives my foot time to heal, and it's after Holland!
Today is Tisha 'bAv and a national day of mourning and a fast that commemorates the disasters that befell the Jewish people on the date the Temples in Jerusalem were destroyed. All the major disaster that have happened to us have been on that date. We'll be adding a new one soon enough with the withdrawal. It was delayed until after that fateful date, but it's still close enough to it to be counted as yet another disaster, and will be counted sooner than anyone thinks.
Yup, it's time to go A View and rant there a bit.

THE GREAT RUN AWAY

It was actually closer to the great limp away! I'm heartily sick and tired of lolling in bed all day long and not even being able to get over here for a bit of computer time. I've been taking the antibiots like a good gimp and this morning the foot felt better so, after a short turn here for e mails, a sort discussion with the phone company about the line that is/was blocked for overseas calls, but now works after three months of scream ups, I got dressed, wrapped the foot in a soft neck brace and got myself settled on Harley Too. I made a quick swing through the bank to sort a potential nightmare, bought fags for the rest of the month, then got a new digicamera. It's a small crap one, but super cheap. Yeah, yeah, I know I broke rule about not buying exactly what I really want, but not totally because what I really want is a camera that works, and this one does. After those errands, I went by the butcher and stocked up on fish, which Orna is supposed to come and cook for me, using my recipes.
I've spent hours tracking down our local second hand guy who is supposed to come and buy the infamous Penguin movable airconditioner that never got used, a couple of heaters and various assorted other useless small appliances, but he's never available. Damn. I really need the money and have no use for the items.
I *did* get hold of the shyster and he tells me that yet another mistake was made by the court office, but he has the decision and will bring it by next week. I fully intend to hound him daily next week about it.
The foot must be getting better as I can now put weight on it and stagger a few steps without feeling like I'm about to keel over. It does still hurt, but, I guess that's normal. It's only 11 days after surgery, and there are 4 bolts in those toes. A major source of joy is that those toes are no longer folded in the down position and I don't have *that* pain any more!! On Thursday I'll know more about when the bolts come out, so until then, I'll be good and stay in bed with foot up and not tempt fate anymore. I have a tendency to push these things, usually with nasty results. The trip to Holland is too important to jeopardize, so I think I'll behave for once.

THE INNER WORKINGS OF A DAMAGED BRAIN

There are times when I don't know if I should throw myself off a high building or just sit back and have a good laugh at myself. I was thinking that it's a good thing I'm already a gimp and have all the required equipment to hand after this operation, wheelchairs, crutches, air mattress, etc. Then it struck me that if I wasn't a gimp I wouldn't have needed the operation in the first place! Like, duh.
Yesterday was pretty good painwise. I only took the post op pain killer once and that was after a relatively long session at the computer. The typical thing is that the toes don't hurt at all. The ball of that foot and the upper part just over the arch are the painful parts, but only when sitting with the foot on the floor at the computer. I think it has something to do with the bandage. Oh, well, I'll find out soon enough. Orna and I are taking my foot to Dr. Sawbones for him to check it and change the bandage a little later, then, maybe shopping.
I think I'll be smart and take the painkiller before we go. I was so pleased that I didn't need it yesterday, but I stayed in and behaved myself pretty much. The worst thing I did was stay at the computer a little too long.I can't believe a week has gone by, and a I haven't really been out except on Tuesday, and even that was just a quick jaunt to do essential things in town. I'm usually pretty defiant about stuff like that and go out anyway. Please don't tell me I've gotten all responsible. It's just not possible. I fully intend to rig a soft something on Harley Too to put the foot on so the bumpy roads won't bother it too much and head out on Sunday. There *are* limits and I've got a bad case of Gimp House Fever. I love Gimp House, but staying in is getting to me. I've even come up with an idea to make BBC's footrest more comfortable on today's excursion; I have a small foam pillow that I can put on the "flipper" and put the foot on to absorb the mayor's pot holes. There are times when I quite impress myself with these 'solutions'
I am hoping against hope that Dr. Sawbones will give me the ok to go to the council meeting tonight at least for a little while. Haim has promised not to drop any more tables on me, so it should be safe.

FOUR TOES AND FOUR DAYS LATER

It's now Tuesday morning and my four pegged (think lobster claws) are feeling better, even after the abuse they were subjected to yesterday. Orna and I went out to do my monthly pay the butcher, get fags,errands and get something for lunch run. Thanks to our ever so smooth streets (a Maine pot hole has nothing on our streets), a new patch of blood appeared on the bandage, and I went through an hour or so of spasms after I got home. Yesterday I had a call from the hospital informing I have to pay for the bolts on my toes. They called back just as I plopped on the bed and told Orna to leave my bag at hands reach. Talk about timing! The bolts were duly charged to my Visa, only 99 shekels for all 4 and I'll get a partial refund. It wasn't as bad as it could have been and only lasted an hour! I was a good gimp for the rest of the day and watched TV and read. I think I also had a wee kip.
Richard called at around 2015 to ask if I was up to some company, and they came over bearing gifts, a lovely watermelon and a picture that Mara painted for me, AND a much welcomed offer of chauffeur service if needed. They bought a car!! Mara hasn't been to Gimp House since all the changes were made and went all gaga over it. We had a lovely visit. I am so blessed to have such wonderful friends. Zahava, Bat Chen, and Rivka call every day, and have offered to come up and help.
I have to go out again on Thursday for Dr. Sawbones to change the bandages and check the toes. I'll stay in until then, but I think I'll be ready to get back on Harley by Sunday. I'm a bit amazed that I haven't tried that yet. Staying in is not something I'm good at! I have to get some shopping done as there is almost nothing to eat left in the house. I've been spoiling myself with take out. The KFC was good for two days and yesterday I had a baguette from Zalman's. I love their mixed grill baguette. I'll consult with Orna about today's treat. I really shouldn't complain, because it really is just a minor irritation considering how well things are going, BUT, my foot really hurts when I sit with it down at the computer. This corner is so cramped that there's absolutely no place to prop it up even a little! However, I CAN stand it for an hour or so now, not like on Saturday when there was no way at all. It *is* getting better though and by next week, I should be back to my normal computer time.
Time to get morning coffee #2 and resettle myself in bed and find Orna. YES, I can now make myself coffee and not even get up from the chair!!

OF TOES AND BOLTS

My foot and toes are home and back at the computer after a somewhat painful, but, interesting weekend!
I was up in plenty of time Friday morning. Orna came in to help with the last minute stuff and off I went in a taxi to the Chop Shop in Haifa. I wimped out on taking the bus and opted for the not free taxi. We go there in record time and I rolled into the shop with the transparent glass kettles and bought one. I spotted a purple glass set of coffee cups and saucers and bought that too. Then it was up in the lift to the 5th floor, where the Chop Shop is. I handed over all the paperwork and fled in the direction of the stairwell for a couple of fags. There was a very nice lady puffing away out there and the subject turned to terror as it often does here. She was a peacnik. *Was* being the operative word. She actually understood what I meant when I told here that peace is all fine and well, but it's just not on if only one side wants it. The other side must as well. Of course it's possible that she was just agreeing with me to humor me before the op. At 0945 I rolled back to reception, where the OR nurse was waiting for me, and in we went. There was half a second of concern about how I'd get on the bed. As it turned out, the concern was warranted. Someone had forgotten to lock the wheels on the bed and if I'd just done my usual hop and plop I'd have gone flying. We got the wheels locked and I got on the bed and into that ever so fashionable open backed gown. There were forms to fill out and the gasspassser arrived with a list of questions. Dr. Sawbones joined the party, and it was off to the OR. I did my situp trick and demanded to know what time the fag break would be. Doc pushed me back down and I promptly popped back up. In my condition, situps are one of the things I'm physically not supposed to be able to do. When we got to the OR there was a very short discussion on how to get me on the table. I just did it to general amazement, then started again with the sit ups. They finally got the IV in and did the spinal, and then strapped my arms to extensions in the hope I'd stay down. Ha! I could still get my head up so they put a contraption up to block any chance of my watching them. The only thing I could do was watch the 'vitals' monitor. Boring, but better than nothing. I could feel that they were doing something down there, but no pain at all.
At one point someone came in and said there was a problem with the hospital part of the thing and I started imagining sorting it by cell phone while the operation continued. THAT would have been something! After 2 hours it was over and I was in recovery, still paralyzed from the waist down. After half an hour, it was up to the room. The feeling came back (no pain yet) and I found I was soaked. I was somewhat expecting this as I have bladder control issues anyway, controlled with handy dandy anti pee pills. I started freaking out and reliving the nightmare that was the hospitalization in Safed after the stroke. A nurse finally arrived and I had a very small hissy fit. He went and called Dr. Swabones who strongly recommended cleaning me up and getting me out of bed and onto BBC. This was accomplished and I headed for the closest stairwell equipped with both cell phones, a small jar of coffee and fags. The janitor was puffing away there on his break and very kindly offered to make me a cup of coffee. Fully equipped at last, I made a few phone calls, then rolled back to bed. I dozed a bit, the went to the loo and as long as I was up, back to my new Headquarters for a fag. Things went along pretty much like that until the leg started spasming. Sorry folks, there's just no way to stop the ouch. A new shift of nurses was on duty and they don't like yelling. I was smart and had packed a container of salt. Between the salt and pain stuff the spasms subsided enough for me to get two hours of sleep before being woken up for temp and BP checks. Dr. Sawbones wandered in at 0845 and checked the bandage, and changed it. He signed the release papers and I called Achy who appeared just before 1100. We headed for Kiryat Shemonah and stopped at KFC for a bucket, arriving at Gimp House just after 1300. Orna had turned on the a/c and propeller. Gimp House was divinely cool, not a/c-ish cold, but just right. Achy left and Orna came over. She made me what I am sure was the best cup of coffee ever, and threatened my life if I so much as looked at the computer. I dozed on and off most of the day and night. Sunday morning found me testing various methods of getting to and from the loo. I have it down cold now. Orna went to town and got the prescriptions for the pain meds filled and brought me a Mickey D's M&M icecream.
We had a meeting of The Council on my bed and I was a good girl and didn't touch the beer. Dr. Sawbones phoned just after they left to see how I was doing. That is unheard of here. I assured him that I was behaving and not doing stupid stuff. He is a dear. I was awake pretty late as I'd been dozing on and off all day. I can make coffee and take Peg out and bring him in all by myself.
yesterday was long and slow. Orna had a gig cleaning and I was left to my own devices. I had a call from the hospital informing me that I have to pay for the bolts in my toes! It's either 99 shekels each or for all of them. No matter, I get a partial refund. She'll call back later today and we'll put them on the Visa. I stayed in bed and read/watched TV. The spasms pretty much stopped and it hurt less to get to the loo, which requires both feet. Orna and I are going out on errands shortly, hence, my presence at the computer for the first time since I sent two e mails yesterday. There is now a very small bloodstain on the bandage, but it hurts a whole lot less. It was really painful when I sent the e mails because it hasn't been down since I got home. That's pretty much it. Not as bad as I thought it would be. It's almost 0800; time to get Peg in, dressed and ready to hit town. More later.....Maybe.