ALMOST TOO EASY

The banking system here is most strange in this day of computers and instant information exchange. I deposited that check on Nov. 11 and have to wait a full month before I can use any of it. Why? Because that's the way it is. Ah, well no use getting all upset about it. I did get what I wanted from Mordy with almost no trouble and didn't even have to show him the asset list. He almost had a stroke when he saw that my other savings were no longer closed away as security for my present credit levels and loan. We zipped that right back up and now he's happy. He originally wanted to close of 25,000 as security for the international credit card, but I got him to agree to only 10,000, which is a much more reasonable amount considering that I only want my present credit limit to continue. It was almost too easy, but as he wrote it out, I'm not too worried about him changing his mind. The card has been ordered and will be here next week.
I put my new "Russians Rule" into effect this morning at the clinic and informed the people (Russians one and all) that as a gimp I don't need to make an appointment or wait in line. It worked and not one them said a word.Pardon me while I giggle with great evility.
The same old guy with the questions was at the bank again this morning and didn't even bother trying to butt in on my turn.
I'm almost afraid to think that there might be hope in that department. I'll just keep on as I started today.
I have two pots of confused soup ready to be put in containers for the freezer, so I think I'll go do that now, then go rest.

GETTING IT STRAIGHT

The annual holiday insanity is well on it's way to nowhere once again. I just don't get what all the fuss is about. The first amendment to the US Constitution is as clear as can be. It says that the Federal Government will not ESTABLISH a national religion. It seems that a dictionary might be required for some of the dolts involved in the idiotic annual "discussion". Having national holidays is not, repeat NOT even close to establishment of any religion. It is simply recognition of the fact that a vast majority of people have a celebration on those days. That's it. Putting up a Christmas tree in the town square is the same and trying to call it a holiday tree is just plain stupid. As long as any religion can use the town square for similar displays, what's the big deal? I don't exactly celebrate Christmas, but I do join in the snail mail card lists at two of my groups and don't get all hot and bothered when I get Christmas cards instead of Hanukkah cards. Sheesh. I even put them up and leave them up for a whole year. I do somewhat deplore what Christmas has become; a celebration of merchandising rather than what *I* think it should be; a sort of Christian Yom Kippur....a time to reflect and atone, but no one appointed me arbitrator for it. So, please knock off this ignorant crap and stop showing the world that you have absolutely no comprehension of English and the US Constitution.
I'm off to bamboozle Murdy at the bank. Early so Bat Chen can't trap me here before I get out!

THE RUSSIANS AREN'T COMING: THEY ARE HERE

I can't stand them. I simply can not tolerate them. They are the only group of immigrants who think that *we* have to adjust to their ways rather than that maybe they should learn our ways. Ok. I will grant that we have a lot of shortcomings but we do have many things sorted reasonably, like lines; as in waiting your turn.Even more annoying is that they just can't be bothered to learn Hebrew. They expect everyone one to have a translator on hand for them and for important notices in the press to be in Russian. Last Monday I almost blew a gasket when the notice on the security channel came up first in Russian. Sorry folks. It should come up in Hebrew first, then in every and any language they can think of, but Hebrew first. No one but no one gave the massive wave of Moroccan immigrants a break and they all learned to muddle along in Hebrew. As did every other group, except maybe the English speakers, and them only because English is taught here and Israelis like to show off their English no matter how bad it is.
Yesterday was fight the Russians day. It started in the bank when a very rude man informed me that he was next in line. He wasn't I was. And aside from that, wheelchairs don't wait in line. We wait for the person being served to finish, then it's our turn. As it is sometimes difficult to maneuver in our wheelys, he got in before I could. Then another clerk arrived to man the desk next to that one, and in I went. Some jerk Russian kept coming over and asking questions until I told him to get lost and wait his turn. Humph. They actually think they did us a favor by coming here. At least that's how they behave. Until yesterday I was perfectly happy waiting my turn at the bank, but no more. I will exercise my wheely rights from now on.
Things went from bad to worse at the clinic. I got there well early but there were 4 Russians ahead of me, and they thought they'd get in to the doc on a first come first serve basis, even though there was a list and I was first on it. One of the office gals came over to sort it and after I got in (I was first on the list) two of them continued to discuss the list in Russian inside the door. I finally got up and shoved them out. And then I discovered that the doc was Russian too, and that his Hebrew was really bad. I corrected him at least 6 times. (ex teacher behavior) and also realized that I know more about cardiac stuff than he does. Must find a proper cardiac quack! G-d help any Russian that gets in my way today.
They came here to get away from the crap that was the old USSR and refuse to conform to our way of doing things. If it's so bad here, go back or anywhere else.
The funny thing is that the Russians who came here in the 70s feel the same way about the Russians who came here in the 90s for the same reasons.
I finally got a batch of whole wheat sourdough rolls made and they taste great. The only problem is that I can't knead the dough long enough.

Orna will have to do that part next time, and I'll finish it off. I have enough for the next few days which will give Orna enough time time to recover from the wedding they got back from at 0300.
My semi macro diet is coming along fine. I've lost at least one of the *triplets* and am well on the way to losing the *twins* and people are noticing.
Orna is doing well too. She's completely amazed at how well it works and that she doesn't feel hungry all the time like she used to. I figured that out too. We feed our bodies so much junk that it demands real food, and when we cut out all the refined stuff like white flour and sugar and go whole grain, no sugar, our bodies are happier and don't tell us they are hungry all the time. It really is just that simple.
I'm trying to decide if I want to go to the bank and argue with the "boss of my money" or stay in and build my whole grain soup. It's not really something I can build, then leave on a low flame, and I'm not sure I want to struggle to get the crock pot out. I picked up some meat on bones for it yesterday (not exactly macro, but there's no substitute for the flavor and Peg gets the meat and bones) and the soup really has to be made today. Ok, crock pot it is, then the bank!

TEMPER TEMPER

I suppose I'll have to apologize to Bat Chen soon. That's ok, because she owes me one too. Poor girl doesn't exactly know English very well, so I'm her solution to all things English. She has been busy putting together a work agreement contract in Hebrew and English for the next time, and I've been putting her off since I was in hospital. I just didn't feel up to it, and she was ok with that until today. She caught me at 0830 before I could escape phone range and we got the English version done. I made the email window nice and small so I could leave the word page regular size and go between them. It took about an hour and a half to get it done as we are both pretty much perfectionists(excluding spelling). In the meantime Orna came to do the dishes and floor, and take out the trash. For a while I wasn't sure who would finish first, and I was hoping it would be me and Bat Chen because I wanted Orna to help with pouring the sourdough started to a fresh bowl. Thankfully, it happened that way and the started was transferred and "fed" with no mishaps. It's looking good, all nice and bubbly. I thought Bat Chen and I were done for the day, and after sorting a few things around the house, started feeling tired and ready for a rest. I no sooner crawled into bed than she called to discuss typos. I told her I was in bed and needed to rest, but she wouldn't let it go and was so gleeful at my typos that I finally lost it and told her that it really isn't that important to me and to just use spell check, and hung up. Come on lady, I had a massive MI and coronary catheterization less than a month ago. Give me a break. Contrary to the way I sound, you don't just bounce back to the way you were before overnight.
I've always been one to push the envelope, but this has slowed me down a bit and when I need rest and tell her so, I expect her to respect it. I'll call her later and explain it slowly and carefully.
I have an appointment with the cardiac doc at the clinic tomorrow. Should be interesting. I'm going to run my rejection theory by him. And he's got the clinic's echo sonar machine. I wonder if that dead part of the heart is still dead. The docs at the hospital said it could come back. I certainly hope it has. It was disconcertingly weird watching the rest of the heart muscle contract and that little part not.
Mordy, *the boss of my bank account* is being diffidcult again, or should I say still. He and I are going to have a very long chat tomorrow. Irit, my loving(not) daughter has been on my account as an emergency something or other since my stroke in '98. I'm taking her off and putting Orna on instead. The bank will be a madhouse tomorrow, but I have a few things to do there, among them, explain to Mordy that the money might be there for now, but it can be taken out PDQ and the rest doesn't have to even go into that bank. A reminder that he'll have to explain how and why my account left that bank to the big bosses.

SOURDOUGH

It's been a few decades since I've bothered to bake bread. The bread here is actually quite good, so I quit making it back in the early 80s. It always felt a bit odd not to be baking bread twice a week like I used to back in Maine. This heart attack nonsense has motivated me to start again. I have no doubt that the attack was result of all the stress back in September and the fact that I pitched my semi macrobiotic diet out the window and went wild on things I hadn't eaten since I don't know when, like butter and fatty lamb and beef. No more. I'm back on my semi macro diet and am getting ready for weekly bread baking. I've got a sourdough starter bubbling away in the pantry and it will be ready to use on Monday.
Orna's sister in law dragged her to a guy in Safad who dabbles in natural healing, and I told her exactly what he would tell her! She is now into this new healthy food thing with me. We are both getting compliments on how much better and thinner we look. Of course it will take me longer to lose what has to go because I am much fatter than she is, but we are on the right track. She already feels better and is quite pleased.
We are going to be doing the bread project together. She found a bakery that does some very nice whole wheat rolls for 1 shekel each. Ok, that might be cheaper than baking them at home, but, we can fancy them up ourselves, and play with different flours. I also have found my prized copy of the definitive rye bread recipe, and can't wait to make it.
It(the recipe) was lost for years, but turned up in an old recipe notebook one fine day. That will be the second bread we make. The first will be some whole wheat rolls for freezing.
I also figured out what that second incident of chest pain was that landed me back in the hospital for two days. It couldn't have been because I didn't take those pills, like they said, because after they let me out, the first thing I did was get those pills and promptly put them in the drug drawer and forget about them! I only discovered them when I had to refill my drug box and they were all there in the package, and I never had so much as a twinge. I am taking them now, but have come to the conclusion that the pain was some form of rejection. I'm seeing a cardiac guy on Monday and will run it by him. Human bodies don't come with preinstalled stents, so it makes sense that my brilliant body tried to reject the stent. Someone really should give me an MD degree, based on experience alone!
It's a beautiful warm day so I think I'll go sit outside and enjoy the sun for a while.

IT'S A COSMIC CONSPIRACY

If my son doesn't call me just after I've fallen asleep, Bat Chen takes over. Aren't post heart attack gimps supposed to get their rest? I guess not.
I met Bat Chen back in 1999 at the first major crip demonstration in Jerusalem and we realized that we feel the same way about a lot of the stuff that goes on in our world of cripdom, and decided to do something about it. We started our own non profit 'help the crips' organization called Ygal which in Hebrew is an acronym for "Got Your Back" It works in Hebrew better than in English, so I'll just use Ygal. Of course me being me, it wasn't long before I decided that I wasn't happy with the direction things were taking and I quit. Bat Chen being Bat Chen, decided that I quit because Arieh Zudkevich, the head of the group that organized the demonstration had threatened me for being involved with Ygal. Not even close to true. I don't react well to threats and told Arieh that. Ah, well, Bat Chen can think what she likes. It hardly matters now and *I* know what really happened.
To make a long story longer, we stayed in touch, mostly when Bat Chen needed help with English. At one point she decided to translate Solomon's Key to English, and came up here for a long weekend to do just that. We made a good start, then she decided to give it to a proper translator to get it right in the few places I had trouble. A few weeks later we decided to bring Ygal back and made a good start. Then, my father died and she started a renovation on her kitchen and we let Ygal ride. Somehow she got involved with a couple who have two disabled sons and run an agency that supplies foreign workers to disabled people. This couple also set her up with the contractor for her kitchen. She decided to get a worker through them as well. The worker set up is a bit dodgy. Bat Chen has license for a worker from the Interior Ministry and they brought her one from India who turned out to be problematic. The way it works is, Bat Chen gets the worker on her papers, he works for her, stays with her and then works at other places. She doesn't pay anything. This arrangement is not legal. In the meantime, the kitchen contractor turned out to be a thief, and did crap work. He also supplied her with a false ID and company details and never gave her a receipt for the money she paid him. The ever so helpful couple took the contractor's side in the dispute. I suggested that she report the contractor to the tax authorities and let them deal with it. She wanted to try and recover her money, and we had a few heated discussions on the subject. At this point I realized exactly who and what she was dealing with. Con artists of the worst kind. A few days ago they brought her yet another worker, this one couldn't have been more illegal if he tried. For starters, the law says that foreign workers that have first degree relatives here can not come here. This one has a mother and brother here. Ergo. On top of that, he was deported back to his country and was obviously not eligible to come back, regardless of relatives already here. Not to be deterred, he got his hands on a passport in the name of a dead citizen of his country. It also turned out that he had open heart surgery which makes him uninsurable here. That lovely couple told the worker and Bat Chen not to declare the surgery to the insurance company. At this point Bat Chen balked, and decided to cover herself by having him sign a statement declaring all the illegal things that couple had him do. Bat Chen and I have been having heated discussions about it for days now. I keep telling her that the only way to deal with these people is to call their bluff and report them. The money is gone and she'll never see it again. It's time to cut her losses and let the cards fall where they may.
yesterday. While arguing with her about the whole thing, I realized that I was getting upset and that it's not good for me, to put it mildly. I told her so and ended by reminding her that there is no way to make a ham sandwich kosher, and no way to make this worker legal when the whole thing is based on a counterfeit identity. It can't be done. Apparently she thought and thought and tortured herself all day. I do understand how hard it is to let go of the hope of recovering losses to conmen. I have Striar The Liar, after all, so I really do understand. I also understand that a point comes when you have to let it go. The major difference between her situation and mine is that I got most of what he owed me and that due to his health, suing him was out of the question. And it would be impossible to get him arrested because technically he didn't do anything illegal. I let myself be swindled. The people Bat Chen is dealing with are involved up to their eyebrows in criminal activity.
So, she had it out with herself, decided I was right and decided to turn everyone in to the relevant authorities, and called me at 0230 to tell me. She's a bit worried about reprisals, so I told her to get her house keys back and to come up here for a few days. I'm expecting a call any minute from her. I don't know if they'll come up today or tomorrow, but I will have company for Thanksgiving. I feel much better that she is going to do the right thing at last. The fact that our national leaders are corrupt doesn't mean we can be too. Sharon et al and my very own local elected officials are about as corrupt as can be, but that doesn't mean we can be too.
Details and updates, as and when.

HERE WE GO AGAIN

I ended up staying in yesterday as Harley Too isn't feeling right. Orna came over early and did the dishes, then ran home because they came to install her cable phone. I spent a while at the computer, then settled myself in bed to watch Charmed. Towards the end of the show, there was some thunder, which I love. There's nothing like a big loud noisy thunder storm. I love them. It wasn't long before the sound of thunder turned into the sound of mortar shells and katyushas. In the 15 years I've lived in this town there was never such a sustained barrage of any kind. It just went on and on. It took a while and a phone call from Achy for me to figure that *they* were shooting at us and not the other way around. Incoming sounds pretty much like outgoing from this distance. Those sneaky hezba'loonies' used the thunder as cover for their attack. After a while they switched from mortars to katyushas and things got a bit insane. Knowing how freaked Orna gets by katyushas, I called her and told her to get over here and into my shelter/*liberry* with her kids. They came right over and we turned on the TV in there and put in some chairs, then we went to the living room to smoke. After a few minutes, other neighbors started knocking on my door looking for shelter. The neighborhood shelters were locked and Army Jeeps were driving around with loudspeakers telling people to go to the shelters. They forgot to mention that the shelters were locked! By the time they got this neighborhood shelter open there were 10 people standing in my shelter and 4 kids sitting on the available chairs. After everyone left to go to the newly opened shelter, I got back into bed to watch TV and listen to the noise outside. It went on for hours, and helicopters and planes joined in.
The timing couldn't have been better. Our government is non existent for all intents and purposes. Whiskers (Amir Peretz) election as head of the Labour party brought about an abrupt end to Sharon's coalition of corruption, and Sharon's announcement that he is forming a break away party with all his corrupt cronies, was as good a go ahead signal as any to Nassralla. The thunderstorm also helped. For once the army was ready and had been on a high alert up here as a result of good intelligence. It's so typical that our idiot local dimwits were caught totally unprepared. With any luck local heads will roll. Our local criminal elected officials are all under investigation for a variety of no nos. They must think that if Sharon's hench men get away with it, they can too. Our mayor and at least half of the city council spend more time in interrogation rooms than they do in town, along with some senior clerks and other over paid functionaries. It's quiet now, but I wonder how long it will last. Never mind the explosions, it's the non stop phone calls that get me. Not that I don't appreciate the sentiment behind them, it's tiring telling everyone the same thing. I think maybe for the next time I'll pre-record all the rote answers. Saying the same thing 20 times gets boring. I think Cab/Kiri Two Legs was more shaken by it than I was, her being in Indo and all. I kind of didn't send a coherent text when things got insane at Gimp House with the flood of refugees and phone calls. I'd best go reassure her now.

CHAMPAGNE MATTRESS

I was sure that the first night in ICU that if the heart attack didn't get me, the bed certainly would. The floor would have been better. At home I have one of the best mattresses to had anywhere in the world, and have an anti pressure sore one on top of that, as well as my well traveled 'between the knees pillow' That pillow is a miracle. Of course, I didn't drag my pillow or air mattress with me in the ambulance and had the most miserable night I can remember. There *is* however a branch of an organization that rents crip stuff in the hospital, so I sent someone to get me an anti pressure sore mattress. It was brand new, still in it's sealed nylon wrapper. We got it sorted and it was like sleeping on Champaign. As it was brand new, the motor that pushes air through it, made little popping sounds that felt like Champaign bubbles. It was a joy. I retired my old mattress and hooked up the new one (they can't be returned) to my old motor and it's still like sleeping on Champaign. Little wee champion bubble poppings. What a delight! Hospital beds should be outlawed, but that's not likely. The nurses kept telling me they were new beds. Well, ok, so they were new. That hardly makes them any more comfortable.
I was drifting off to sleep last night, enjoying the bubble effect, when the phone rang at 0130. It was my son calling to explain some more about what the Wicked Step of Evility had to say about the will. This after he called the other day at 0230 to tell me the amount. If what he says is true, lots of money is missing, I mean hundreds of thousands. Or, the WSOE doesn't understand the very will I have no doubt she dictated to the shyster. There's no way Dad made that will on his own, not at the age of 80.
I am working very hard at keeping calm and have decided to wait until I get the notice Aron and The Jeffey got last week before doing anything. If it's like they both reported, I'm going to demand a full accounting be given the probate court of all Dad's assets. Something is very wrong there. Right now there's not much I can do except wait for the mail.
In the meantime, I'm busy planning my Feb. jaunt to England and a quick weekend to a luxury hotel at The Dead Sea for me and Orna. We deserve it after what we've been through with my hear attack. Three days of lazing around and being pampered. She really needs a break from her day to day struggle, and I just want a change. I'm waiting a bit before buying a car and after 'driving' myself nuts trying to figure out how to get there, remembered that I can rent a car! So that's what we'll do. I think, either the weekend before, or after my birthday. Yup, that's a plan! And a not bad way to spend a rainy day.

MINDLESS MEANDERINGS and MUSINGS

We've all seen heart attacks on TV and read descriptions of them, and I'm pretty sure that is why I'm still here to write this. I knew what was happening pretty much as soon as it started, and called the paramedics. It was a very strange experience for several reasons. One was that I was conscious the whole time. Wide awake, no where close to passing out or anything like that. Yeah, it hurt, but I've had much worse pain just about every day since that run in with the katyusha. Most of the heart attacks on TV show the victim as unconscious and in dire need of electric shock heart jumper cable restart therapy or clutching his chest while writhing in pain. I was wide awake the whole time and remember it all, including the cardiac catheterization. I watched the monitor with the docs and even bantered a bit with them. Why don't they show stuff like that on TV? I'm trying to figure out if it's better to be awake like I was, or out of it. I'm not totally sure that these are memories I really want to have. It might be better to wake up afterward...........? As no one asked me, I guess I'll just have to deal with the memories as they exist.
I *do* have a lot to be thankful for and I am, believe me, I am. I'm not afraid of death, it's just that there's a lot more I want to do in this life. I still have to sort things for The Jeffey, and help Bat Chen get Ygal moving. She's not moving much on it and that's too bad because there are lots of issues that have to be addressed.

LEGAL RELEASE

It had to happen. I have been so proud of my perfect record for never staying in hospital until released by the docs, that I am very disappointed in myself now. I went to the clinic on Sunday to get an ECG done so I'd have a tape to take with just in case. The hospital docs recommend that, and my doc didn't like the read out, so he sent me back to hospital. Richard took me this time, and I went prepared to stay with all my equipment.
The ER didn't quite know what to do with me other than to check me in for observation. They wanted a chest X Ray for some reason, and wouldn't let Richard take me in BBC. They insisted on an orderly taking me in the ER bed. Richard tagged along with BBC and I turned it into a race by sitting up and making wheely chair movements with my arms and making tire squealy noises around corners, and siren sounds when we met beds going in the other direction. The orderly/bed driver was wearing purple scrubs and I kept up a running request for him strip on the spot and give them to me. Looking back, I think I'm lucky they didn't put me in the psychiatric unit for observation, but it was fun and livened things up a bit. When they finally decided that they wanted me for observation in the cardiac unit, Richard and I had my bed all set up with my pillows and anti pressure sore mattress before the nurse got there to admit me. She was most impressed. They hooked me up to a remote ECG thingy and the leads kept falling off, so I'm not sure how much use it was. I was a good gimp and stayed in bed or in BBC out on the balcony. Striar The Liar showed up every day to entertain me, and I was nice to him. He's off the hook now that I've gotten the insurance check.
They decided to let me out on Tuesday and Richard came to get me at 1830. It's so good to be home again. I went to the doc to get the meds sorted. The hospital docs said the latest incident was because I didn't take one of their pills. I couldn't very well take it because it had to be ordered through the clinic and that took a few days. I don't think that was the reason at all. I think it was the excitement of the insurance check arriving and Mordy's nutty reaction when I deposited it! It kind of looks like any kind of excitement is to be avoided. Would someone please explain how I do that?
It's getting late and I have to do a few things before the ex gets here.

GOT ONE KID RIGHT!

Aron called the other day to find out how the old gimp is doing. Yes, the kid who had so much trouble with his mother has suddenly found himself and come to the conclusion that I really am not the vile witch he used to think I was. We talked for about an hour and it was wonderful. I'd almost forgotten how funny he is. Then, he dropped the bombshell! He votes Republican. I almost fell out of bed. I'm so used to my kids doing the opposite to what I do that this really threw me. He even said that he never told The Philmore because it was assumed that Aron voted Kerry (random choking sounds) that he was sure that if he fessed up to voting Bush he'd be out of the will. He's probably right on that score. He got quite a laugh when I described what I did with a bottle of Heinz ketchup the day after the election. Especially as it was Irit's ketchup. He knows as well as anyone that I don't touch, much less eat the stuff.
We talked about his sister a bit and he's horrified by her behavior and asked if she knows about the heart attack. I said that she probably does and from the same place he found out. (his father) We had a bit of a giggle over how disappointed she must have been when she found out I'd survived it. Bad luck is following her around lately. I survived, and it seems the new baby is colicky. Am I allowed to enjoy that tidbit?
I'm feeling better day by day, but still not up to writing about the thing just yet. That day isn't far off.
I had a fantastic moment at the bank. Mordy, the ass't manager who so loves to make my life a misery, had the authorization of payment letter from that life insurance policy shoved under his nose, and was told very calmly to do this, this, and that. With that amount before his very nose, he didn't have much choice than to acquiesce! It's not
$ 6500, it's $ 8100! And it should be here any day. Is it any wonder I'm feeling so much better? I'm venturing out today to sort a few things that left unsorted by my abrupt departure by ambulance.

SORT OF BACK

If Orna, my self appointed guardian angel, catches me posting here, it'll be all over! She'll never believe it's just a quick post to say that I survived a pretty nasty heart attack, treatment at the local hospital, a Murdockian escape, and a few other not fun things. I'm feeling pretty good this morning, and the plan is to go out for a quick trip to the clinic, by way of the local scooter fix it guy. Harley Too's charger seems to be on the blink, and with luck it's just a blown fuse.
The quacks went all "quit smoking" on me, so I'm compromising. 3 fags a day, 1 with morning coffee, 1 after lunch and 1 after dinner. That's me, defiant as ever.
I had enough presence of mind when it happened to shove the cell phones (but not the chargers) in my bag before the ambulance got here. By Thursday morning the batteries were out of juice. Orna and Danny brought them on Saturday and I sent Cab/Kiri a text about the heart attack. Bless her. Our somewhat crazy texts kept me in as good a mood as possible. She called me yesterday, and I laughed/cried for ages. She makes me feel so good. Achy came by to see me twice and only he and Cab/Kiri seem to understand why I had to get out of there AMA. I called the ex on Saturday and he'll be in the country on Friday. I hope he'll find the find the time to come up for a visit. I rather suspect that his daughter is going to get an earfull from him as her behavior was a major contributor to the stress that brought on the attack.
I kept notes while in hospital, and will sit down here with those notes and write the whole thing up one day soon. Some of the notes are in the cell phone, some on the covers and blank pages of the 'what to do after a heart attack' booklet they gave me. I also have to sit down and write a strong letter of complaint about that so called hospital. You'll be able to read all about it in a few days. Enough for now. I just wanted to let my 3 faithful reader know that I'm ok and back!

TELEPHONE OBSESSION

The cable phone guy just left. He confirmed that something indeed was very wrong. Mr. Installer Guy forgot to connect a critical wire, so only one cable connection was working, the cordless phone! Now all of them are. I'm happy to report that I'm only one phone short in my insane network. There's a phone in both lines in the *liberry*and, next to the computer. All I need now is one more for next to my bed to be able to have Bezeq for incoming calls and cable for outgoing. Richard and Mara have two of my phones. As they don't have a line at all, I think I'll ask for one back. Not a bad system when it's functioning. I had a loverly snooze after a cup of nice hot (fake) chicken broth only to be awoken by Striar the liar. I love telling him "It's ok, I had to get up to answer the phone anyway." Drives him bonkers. He's very concerned about my inheritance, and I am having great fun not telling him anything except vague outlines. Let him suffer. Even if he were to get his hands on the will itself (public record) there are no amounts there! Who knew payback would be so much fun?
I have a short list of subjects that I wanted to get into here, but don't have the time today. Tomorrow I *will* stay in. Right now it's time to call The Jeffey!

CAUGHT OUT

It simply can not rain in this country without me being outside without rain gear. It happened to me again today! The weather people (would someone please shoot them and put me out of their misery?) said it would rain all day up here. Well, it didn't start until I'd left the house. The original plan was to stay in, but last night I woke up with an insane craving for something sweet and I generally do not like sweets, so there were none in the house. I have learned to listen to cravings, so decided to go out and get something sweet. Of course I had no sooner checked my mail box than the rain started, and I was in my BasscatcherBob vest over a thin jacket, and my BU cap. Being a slave to my cravings and having been shot against flu and pneumonia, I continued on my sweet quest.
As I couldn't get the shop I wanted, thanks to some spoiled fat assed jerk who parked his la-di-da Chevy on the ramp, I continued on to the supermarket, where it took me almost an hour to decide what to buy. I finally settled on some cheap Israeli wannabe counterfeit Oreos. They were cheap, and of course when I left the store, a great big truck was blocking my only exit. I ended up waiting untill it moved, by which time it was pouring rain. Did I get wet? What do you think?
I'm home and dry now, and yes, the rain has stopped! I am now going to crawl into bed with a nice hot cup of (fake) chicken broth, and read, and maybe nap.

UPSET DOESN'T QUITE COVER IT

Ok, now that I've read and pretty much memorized The Philmore's will, and thunk hard on it for a couple of days, I'm just about ready to the rage out here.
The first person who tries to tell me that it's his money to with as he pleases had best start running real fast. It is, and it isn't. Every single thing/penny he had was due to my mother, and she made the mistake of leaving it all to him with the explicit understanding that it would eventually go to me and The Jeffey. She obviously didn't take Aunt Sylvia's( auntie Yenta) match making tendencies into account. Auntie Yenta decided that The Philmore and The Stepmother of Evility would be a good match, and so they were. The SOE never liked me, and she absolutely detests my bother. So, what's wrong with the will? Now, don't get the idea that I'm a money grabbing bitch, because, I'm not. I'm more upset on The Jeffey's account than my own. After all, I have a very nice disability payment every month, so I'm set for life. The thing that so enrages me is that the way The Philmore set things up, the SOE can do anything she wants with everything and anything he had, including give it to her kids at any time. There's a clause that says that she gets 50% of the funds in the trust, the residue of which is supposed to divided between me, the Jeffey, Irit and Aron after she checks out, but until then, it's hers to do with as she wishes. Be pretty hard to divide nothing between us. He also stipulated that if I pop off before she does, my kids get my share. No way. They have their own shares of that nothing. I must find a way to be sure The Jeffey gets my share, and that there's a share to get. I guess I'd just better be sure I outlive her, so I can make sure The Jeffey gets it. Once it's mine, there's nothing anyone can do about who gets it. I just knew there would be impossible strings from his grave. And I don't trust that SOE as far as I can walk. Of course there's a no contest clause. Did anyone think for a minute that there wouldn't be?
I'll be talking to my Florida lawyer in the next few days to see if an eagle eye can be kept on the residue, in spite of her. There must be a way. She had her own small fortune when they got married and The Philmore took care to tell me, before they got married, that what was his, would go to us and hers, to her kids. Hmph. I see her at work here.
The SOE completely ignored the fact that The Philmore was married before she even heard of him, to OUR MOTHER. I just hope there's a legal way out of this. Hells, any way is ok with me. Gotta get The Jeffey settled.

PIGGY BANKS ETC.

There was a report on the news recently that some bank in England decided to stop using the term piggy bank out of consideration for their Mussie clients. Odd, we have the same, if somewhat older, restrictions about pigs, but as far as I know no Jewish person ever thought to ask anyone to stop using the term! Hells, the term is pretty much universal in Englishes speaking countries, and can refer to anything used to save coins, from an old coffee tin to a proper piggy bank in the shape of a pig. I even know people who called the JNF(Jewish National Fund. The money that was used to buy land here in the name of the Jewish People) collection boxes 'piggy banks'. What is the world coming to when we have to stop using the words 'piggy bank' because some Mussie might take offense? Don't bother answering that, I already know the answer. I'm sure you've all figured out by now that I've done my bit for Western democracy, and freedom of expression, and bought a piggy bank today! It might be in the shape of a purple hippopotamus, but that doesn't change the fact that is, and, always will be a PIGGY BANK! It's giving in to them on these seemlingly small issues that will come back to haunt us in the near future. Must go and put it in pride of place and dig all the small change out of the mortar bowl that was until today my piggy bank! I have a good spot to retire the mortar and pestle to! It served long and well.

WORDS OF WISDOM and even MORE ABOUT TELYPHONES

Here's some very important advice: If you happen to be a gimp with foot problems and find it easier to lurch around in big fluffy doggie slippers, and decide to go out on a very hot day, wearing a sleeveless dress, do not forgot to take the slippers off and put sandals on. The minute you lurch out the door you will feel a right idiot wearing those slippers. I know this to be true because it happened to me last week. Also, if you are a gimp that has to shower sitting down, take those slippers off BEFORE you get in under the water. Those fluffy furry fuzzy slippers take forever to dry. I don't have to repeat myself and tell you how I know, do I?
One more bit of advice: If you get a will in the mail and are on an electrick scooter, do not stop under a shade tree to read it unless you are prepared to tell every single person who goes by why you are crying. There is also the hazard of blurred vision when you finally realize that it can wait until you get home. Trust me here. This I also know to be true.
Back before the century of holidays started, I saw a fantastic telyphone at Sari's store. That woman should be against the law. She has many things purple and wooden. I just adore the things she has there. I've had that phone, an old fashioned looking one with one of those funky skinny receivers that sits on those brass hooky looking things that stick up, and an old round rotary dialer. I decided on the very day I saw it that I must have it as it will fit in my living/dining room perfectly. It's all roundy curvey like the table and chairs, and is a nice dark wood.
I bought it today! And it looks even better than I thought it would. Of course my trip to Sari's couldn't end with just a telyphone. There had to be something else! This time the something else was a leather covered vanity table with lots of little drawers and a mirror and matching stool. It was love at first sight, and Sari will hold it for me. It's an amazing piece of furniture and will fit right in with my dark antique stuff.
I'm home now, so after a shower without doggie slippers, I'm then crawling into bed to memorize the will!

Cab/Kiri's blog

This should be required reading! http://kiriokiri.blogspot.com/

THIS IS GETTING OLD

I'm getting well and truly fed up with saving this page where I want it. It stays there for a day or so, then self deletes!
Didn't get much done yesterday or today, but at least the month (it seemed like a year) of holidays is over, and tomorrow I'll be able to get back to my usual activities.
Peg ran out of food last night, so first thing this morning I called the doggie store. They are supposed to be here with it any minute. I was zipping blissfully though the several thousand (or was it million?) posts at the VA when Bat Chen called and asked for some emergency translation. We plowed our way through that in an hour or so, and nothing else got done.
I never even finished my first coffee!
The idiot new cable phone isn't working so I unplugged the modem in the hope it will sort itself. If not, I'll call them. Nope, no joy there. The lights are all blinky. Gotta dig out their number and give them a shout! Even before that, I think I just might make a fresh cup of coffee and finish this.
Cab/Kiri is doing pretty well with her blog. It's a joy to read. If you want a fun read, look up Funkadelic Sandwiches at Blogger. It's well worth it.
I've been driven wild over the last few months by Dwight fans who joined the Dark Matters list and started gushing all fannish there. I've had a private word with two of them, and luckily the third emailed me off list to ask, and I headed her off at the pass. Granted, a fair number of us are there because of him, at least that's how and why we went there to start with, but most of us sort kind of almost forgot he was there too and really got into the list and radio show on their own merits. Doesn't the guy deserve one list where he doesn't have to run for cover from over zealous fans? He *is* very generous about sharing himself with us at cons. It annoys me that some just don't get it and need to have it explained of words of less than syllable! If this latest lot behaves themselves, maybe he'll stop in and post more often. He's certainly done enough for us, isn't it time we give him a little too, even if it's only peace and quiet from fannish behavior? Poor guy, you'd think he has enough to contend with, with me flying all over the globe to see him?
Off now to organize fresh coffee and catch up on the guy who went boom in Hadera, today.

SOMETHING IS WRONG

There seems to be a minor problem with Firefox. Every time I try to add this page to the tool bar folder, it self deletes after a few minutes. I hope I'm not the only one with this problem and that they'll sort it soon.
I'm pretty much recovered from the worlds shortest case of the flu. All that's left is an itchy nose, but no more leaks from said appendage, and I feel just fine, if sleepy.
Yesterday I figured out what is bothering me so much about the Wicked Stepmother of Evility. She never once asked me or The Jeffey if there were any of Dad's things we wanted. There ARE two things I want and I know they were in the house not long ago, at least one. Way back when I was in Jr. High, I made a clay thingy of a face and glazed it half black and half white. It actually won a prize and Dad was so proud of it that it was always on display. I want it. He also had a slide rule in a leather case. I want that too. I'm really not up to calling and asking her for those things partly because she should have asked, and partly because I just want to forget that she even exists. I *do* have the important things though; Dad's baby book, and the love letters he wrote to Mom. And a few other things like the telegrams they got when they got married, their wedding picture, and some things he gave Mom over the years. I told Dad that I had them about a year ago and he thought that was great! I think so too, especially in light of the way she ignored the fact that he actually had a life before they met. I'll ask The Jeffey if there's anything he wants and if there is, I'll make sure he gets it. At least he has some of the stuff from the Longfellow Ave. house we grew up in, like the insane French Provincial mirror with the shelves and the nik naks that go with it, and some other things. Funny how comforting those things are. I still get a bit weepy when I look at them, but I am a well known senti'mental' slob, and blubber at the slightest excuse.
The holidays are almost over, and things should get back to normal(?) by Sunday. This bunch of holidays all in the same month is a bloody pain as nothing functions until they are over. Not that things ever function as the should in any event, but at least the government offices aren't on group vacations and shut down. Now, they can all go on their annual post holiday strike!
Orna asked why I haven't been going there on Fridays for dinner, so I explained about the texting, and she didn't much like it. I'll go this week, and see how she likes it when I get going with the texting! There is nothing in the world I'd rather do than text with Cab/Kiri, unless it's to actually be able to sit and talk with her face to face, or should I say Murdockian to Murdockian? If The Plan comes off we'll be able to do that in 2007, and it can't come soon enough for me. It might even happen sooner than that, if she could stand a nice quiet weekend in some resorty type hotel over there in her area. That idea is running rampant in the remnants of my mind. I'd much rather go volcano climbing, and general exploring, but that's kinda hard to do in a wheelchair! A nice 4 day weekend at a resorty place is much more my speed. I'll start working on that as soon as I get the next two trips organized. UK in Feb, Maine in the spring, then, the Far East.
It's coming up to nap time now. I was up most of the night for no good reason, made a quick run into town for fags, fish and ground beef, so I can go crash in bed for a bit.